Downton Abbey--last night's wrap up

Season Three.  Week One.  Downton Abbey.

Here's a quick wrap up if you missed it last night.   

Get over yourself, Matthew, and take the damn money from Lavinia's father.  Your father-in-law is no brain trust and he needs the cash bad so shuck all your self righteousness and just do it.  I worried about what is gonna happen half the night last night, so just do it so I can sleep tonight.

Lady Edith, one good lap dance and that one armed guy will be all yours.  He's sweet though a little giddy at times, and you need a husband and he needs a wife, so get on with it.  Besides, I like weddings and I want to see another one, pronto. 

Now, as for Thomas and O'Brien, you guys are a match made in schemers heaven so for heaven sake, don't let up.  I want you two fightin' like two cats in a bag before season three ends. 

Mrs. Levinson, you are no dummy not to give your son- in- law any more money, but if they don't fix your makeup and that deathly pallor they've given you, they might as well lay you out on a table now and just wait for you to kick.  With that make up job, your time's about up.

Dowager Countess, you are a crack up and steal every scene you are in.  Bravo for sending Lady Sybil and Tom the money to come for the wedding.  Why, you are a sly old fox aren't you?

Mrs. Hughes, Mrs. Pattmore and the gang will all take care of you if it does turn out to be cancer, and if it's not, well thank the good Lord.  You do need to tell Mr. Carson, though, because he thinks you aren't doing your job and will be all over you unless you give him the 411.  Girlfriend, just tell him.

Anna, we need a really good plot twister to get Mr. Bates out of jail before he kills his cell mate.  That other guy is just itchin' to get himself choked to death and your husband has had about eeeeenuf.

Tune in here for next week's wrap up.