I am soooo over it I could just scream--- and I already did outside in the backyard. Do not say BGE to me for at least a week or I may foam at the mouth. I lit my Egg, it seemed to be ready, on went Ms. Turkey Hen, and I could not get it to 350 degrees to... save.... my life. I took her off. I added charcoal, and let it burn. I used the leaf blower to getter' going and the heat would shoot. I'd slide on the turkey, shut the lid, and wait. Tick...tick...tick...it would hover around 300 degrees but climb no higher. I opened vents. I closed vents. Nothing changed.
So, I finally called in the heavy artillery--Judy at Jackson's Lemon Avenue Pottery. She was with a customer so after I hung up, I threw such a rod in the backyard that I added the rest of the bag of charcoal and almost totally smothered the fire. And then I screamed cuss words at the top of my lungs Mature, no? I even dug some remaining charcoal out of the bag
with my hand. My entire right arm, and my shirt, was covered in soot, so I tried to take a picture of myself with my camera on my phone, looking in a mirror. And then,
I was laughing too hard..... and then I got MAD. Shittttttt.
Our poor turkey already looks like it's been to Afghanistan and it's not even cooked. I turned on the oven, and decided who ever got to 350 degrees first was doing the job, and the oven WON. I am almost berserk and it's only Tuesday.....this is not good.
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