We caved

Well, damn...I hope this makes you ultimately laugh as hard as it did me and my siblings.  My mother may have dementia, but she can still outfox me when she wants to...holy cow.  I called her this morning and told her no church today since it was wet and cold, and since she'd just fallen and conked her head Thursday.  She said "OK".  OK my eye.  Little did I know but she called her friend, told her she wanted to go, and off she went!!!  And then, went on to lunch, too!! 

After kibitzing with my siblings, we thought we were on the right path to keep mom safe.  That is until her friend shot some artillery in our direction that, frankly, made great sense.  Her friend said "Look...this is NOT too much for me.  Let me do this because I enjoy it-- and your mother does, too.  Don't take this away from both of us just because you are afraid she may fall.  She may fall--no question--but does it really matter where she falls??  If she's at church or at the Country Club, we can call 911 just like the Plaza can and she loves to get out. It's really mean of you all not to let her do this".  I acknowledged it FELT mean-- but I just wasn't sure what the best thing to do was yet.

And then the tears turned on and I really did know.  I finally lost it on the phone....to think that the last of mom's friends who she even sees anymore, would go to bat for her like that, was just humbling.  I cried..... and told Mrs. Lide how much I loved her and appreciated her, and what an incredible friend she was to mom.  I also made her SWEAR that when it gets to be too much, she'll tell me, and she promised she would.  I told her we were just so scared we weren't doing "the right thing" for mom by not "protecting her"--like we can actually really do that anyway.  We can't.  So, score one for the old ladies team.  Man...they are some strong medicine.  And wise, too.