Adios, 2010 and a big, fat, see ya

Since tomorrow is a fresh slate--a whole new year to write on--what do you want to write on yours?  Have you given it any thought and if not, OK, but do you want to stay just like you are or are you someone who wants to improve, change, or grow?  Count me in the later category.  I'd like to peel back another layer and learn more about myself.  Nobody says it will fun or comfortable, but I'm still willing to do it.  And I definitely want to exercise more, simply because I feel better when I do it.  I'm not talking any of those teeth grinding workouts--I'm talking about something fun like grabbing my Ipod and either dancing or walking to music I love.  Good music.  And lots of Soul music, too, like all that Motown stuff.  Add in lots of C&W stuff and if I learn the lyrics, I'm gonna SING while I walk or dance, and if you don't like it, either don't listen or turn down another damn block, because honey, here I come.  And I'm singing.  Loud.

And freedom....I plan to practice lots more of that.  Saying no when I mean it and saying yes when ever I can, when it is not detrimental to me.  Yeah, ME.  I'm done with people pleasing and care taking where it's not needed, since both are harmful to ME.  They are also insulting to the people I do them to, so that's another great reason to stop.  If someone doesn't like the choice I've made, that's OK.  My job in life is not to please everyone I meet or know--it's to be kind.  And sometimes the kindest thing I can do for someone else is to say "no, thank you", and take care of myself.

Now, I can see your eyes rolling back in your head like "she is THE most selfish person ever".  I'm not--I'm just willing to take care of myself, since it is my job after all.  I understand that to some people that will look selfish-- and that's OK with me.  I know the difference between being selfish and practicing self care, and they are two entirely different things-- and sometimes they are even the same.  It all depends on my motive.  Sometimes you have to choose yourself first 'cause I guarantee you, nobody else will.
And to close out 2010, that's just how I see it.