1. You read FB and understand about half of some of the language but you still get the general gist.
2. You have to wear your computer glasses to read anything, period.
3. You can't blog with the TV on since your brain "screener" no longer works, and the noise makes you crazy.
4. You ask your husband to turn down the TV volume and when he's gone, turn it back up, a teence.
5. You make a South Beach diet dessert and use the sugar substitute in an equal amount that the recipe calls for vs. checking to see how many packets of Splenda equals a 1/4 cup
6. As a result of #5, you may eventually glow in the dark or grow hair on your tongue because you ate the damn dessert anyway. And, your tongue may possibly fall out.
7. You look at life as the hilarious event that it truly is vs having every day be yet another crisis.
8. You love your adult, grown children so hard it hurts, and still try to stay out of their business.
9. Baby anythings make your hands itch to hold them--except snakes, rodents, insects, sharks...you get the drift.
10. You love your partner more today than even when you married him and you'd do it all over again.
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