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Monday, November 28, 2011

Local Tsunami

Saturday afternoon, I was hit with a wig wearing tsunami and not in a good way either.  I had been lying down reading when the doorbell rang, accompanied by some serious banging.  Fred was blowing leaves so I wasn't sure why the doorbell was still ringing.  I opened the door, and that's the last time I got a word in edgewise.  A youngish African American gal immediately went into her spiel on a cleaning products she was selling, and proceeded to spray part of a window, showing me how clean and nice it was...then she blasted past me into the kitchen and showed me how well it worked on stainless steel, telling me she had a stainless steel refrigerator "jes lak dis 'un".  Whaaaat?   And that's why she's going door to door, right?  That big booming career path she's got going has enabled such a purchase.  OK...that's lie #1, I'm thinking.

OK...I am beginning to recover enough to head her towards the front door, when Fred blows through the back door, to make sure I have not been killed my this purple velour sweat suited, pony tailed wig- wearing woman, who has a mouth on her straight outta South Dallas.  Twice she told me "I ain't here to clean yo' hole house", and I'm thinking that's because she's really a serious career woman.  She wanted me to buy one of her bottles of cleaner, and she'd drop it back by.  OK...there it was.  Lie #2., I am blonde...but I am not that blonde.  When I told her "I heard ya and no thanks", her lightening fast reply as she shoved off down the block was " Wellll...iffin yo dun 'herd me, then yuda baaa wun", and off she went in a snit, with that wig  a'slidin back and forth on her head.

I swanny.....I did not know what had hit me for about 10 minutes, and thank the good Lord above that old leaf blowing Fred was here, or no telling what might have happened.  When she left, all he could say was what the hell was that??  And I had no answer.

And speaking of fast talking women, it seems Hudson told his mom the other day that "Hadley talks too much to me, mom...make her stop!"  Isn't that hilarious?  His dad said "Yeah...your mom and Hadley need to get... a.... room". it's a woman thing.  Deal with it.

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