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Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Wise older women

I love wise older women.  I'm speaking specifically about the ones with some real life experience--not the ones who spent their years at Tom Thumb and the hair dresser.  I'm talking about the ones with careers, children, kids with issues, their own broken marriages, maybe a remarriage, a few significant deaths--ladies who've really been there.  The ones that really get it and can connect with you at a deeper level in a second with a comment.

This just happened to me at one of my favorite stores.  The owner and I were chatting about a jacket and a pair of pants I'd bought a few months back when mom's trajectory was looking especially grim.  I was thanking her and another lady who had been there at the time for their help pulling me together at a time when I felt anything but "together".  She told me " Honey, we all gain our weight in times of stress so be gentle with yourself...just do it if you need's not a will come back off afterwards when your mom is gone".  I looked into her crystal blue eyes and almost lost it.  She saw me....she really saw me.  She understood.

Some older ladies have that innate ability to just say what they are thinking so gently if feels like a hug.  Like they've just covered you up with a soft blanket as you are nodding off to sleep, exhausted from being a big girl.  They understand.  They've done it.  They've felt the same feelings and you can see the honesty of it in their eyes.  They pull no punches with you.  They are a soft nurturing place to fall when you just can't be big one more second.

I walked out of her store feeling like I'd been given one of the nicest gifts ever.  The gift of being seen.

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