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Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Slippery people

How do you handle slippery people...you know the kind I'm talking about. The ones who look and act like they are pure as the driven snow but are just, well, Teflon coated. These are people that you almost trust, but that niggling little voice inside your head says "Honey, you can trust them if you want, but I wouldn't". When I'm around this type of person, or people, my radar is just ON and I watch them like a hawk. And then I further confuse myself by thinking "OK, nobody's perfect...even you, Miss Priss"....but then the radar thing starts again. Warning...Warning...Warning. And I am back to hawking, until I realize something's missing here.........Oh, yeah, boundaries. Somebody's outside their hula hoop and either in my business or someone else's--- and not respecting boundaries.

Today I'm learning to look back and gather evidence--if there is any. And examine it carefully. Is this a pattern or a one time fluke? And by the way, once is a fluke, twice is a coincidence, and three times is a PATTERN. Make no mistake about it. If I'm still unclear at this point, I discuss it with someone else whose judgement I respect, and who is not involved. I used to try to have everyone fall into two categories--ones I could trust (good boundaries) and ones I couldn't(no boundaries)--and today it's no longer that black and white for me. People are just people-- and there are some that cleanly fall into their respective category, and others....well, they are just gray and slippery-- and I better pay attention to what my gut is telling me. Look out. Beware. Proceed with caution. Cuidado.

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